cheater cheater pickle eater
by neworldiscoverer
Summary: Gail/Oliver moment, one-shot set shortly after Project Dakota wraps up, 4.01-ish-They've been steady riding partners since McNally and Collins split and took that deep undercover assignment. She's sure that it'll change once Andy's back on shift. She's not sure what she thinks of that.


"So Peck."

They're at a red light and Gail turns to look at Oliver. They've been steady riding partners since McNally and Collins split and took that deep undercover assignment. She's sure that it'll change once Andy's back on shift. She's not sure what she thinks of that. Doesn't think about it much. Really. Change happens.

"Yeah?" She snaps her gum at him.

"You gonna tell me your ninja joke?"

"What ninja jo-" she falters there, Oliver giving her a pointed look.

"Don't lie, Peck. You said you had a ninja joke and I want to hear it." He smiles a thin smile at her. "Light's green."

She huffs and puts her hands back on the steering wheel. Pops her gum some more, foot on the gas pedal. They're driving through some of the rougher neighborhoods downtown. Best said something about keeping the 5-0 visible or whatever, scare off the amateur hoodlums.

"Okay, fine." It's twenty-five mph, "slow children" and out of all things, the city had put in speed bumps. This wasn't exactly the place for drag racing. It was practically the ghettos. Gail drives over the bumps with a little more speed than is appropriate.

"There's two ninjas talking to one another, right?" She glances at him sidelong, out of the corner of her eye. Oliver's looking out the window, rubs his fingernail against a smudge on the glass.

(Gail takes the pickles he removes fastidiously from his sandwiches and eats them without asking now.)

"The first ninja says to the other, "Man, I'm swamped. I have two murders and three assassinations this week. How about you?"

The second ninja replies, "Nothing yet, looks like I've got time to kill."

Oliver imitates a rimshot. "Ba-dum cha!"

Gail snorts. "You get it? You know. Like. "Time to kill?""

"Got it, Peck, got it, uh-huh." He bites his lip and she can't see his expression.

"Hey Peck." It's not five minutes later, break lights on as she stops for some kids to cross the street. Their basketball gets loose from them, narrowly misses their bumper. Oliver interrupts her before she even opens her mouth to go off.

"What." She doesn't try to keep the half-growl, half-snarl out of her voice and face. He just loves annoying her, she thinks. Doesn't know why she never stops him.

"I got a good pirate joke. You know, 'cos pirates versus ninjas and all that."

She's debating in her head whether or not it's too early to be heading to that deli that they both like. It's basically the only place in the city that they both can agree on.

(Otherwise it's a lip-sync rap battle, whoever messes up first loses their right to pick the lunch venue. That horrible rap station is the only preset on their cruiser's radio.)

"You ready for it?"

Gail rolls her eyes. "Shoot me now," she drones.

"Okay, here goes." He even sits up straighter in the seat, untwists his seatbelt where it lays across his vest. "What do pirates and pimps have in common?"

"I don't know, Shaw. What?" she fakes a perky voice and smile, transparently sarcastic in a way that only a Peck can pull off, and she knows it.

Oliver remains undaunted. Finishes the joke. "They both say "yo ho" and walk with a limp."

She actually laughs. Catches herself, but not before an boisterous cackle slips out.

Oliver grins at that. Picks up on the radio when a call for a B&E comes in. They're in the neighborhood. "Ready to rumble, Peck?"

"I was born ready," she answers, flipping on the cruiser's lights, wincing a little when realizing that her answer sounded far too much like one of his. Blames it on spending too much time with him. Thinks about asking Best to let her ride with someone else. This isn't the first time she's thought it. Never acted on it though.

"Hey, I got one more for ya," he says as they pick up speed.

Gail has both hands on the wheel. Flicks her blue eyes at him.

"Why did the pirate go to the Apple store?"


End file.
